What I've Been Reading: Me Before You

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Me Before You is one of the books I read while on holiday. Every now and then I like to read something different to my usual choice of crime thrillers. Sometimes I go to the library and browse the shelves and other times I Google the top 10 books to read from this year or last. Google found me the three books I downloaded on the Kindle; The Girl on the Train, Me Before You and A Little Life.

I was drawn to this book because of the hint of romance, the carer in me and my thoughts on disability. I really enjoyed getting to know the characters and following the development of relationships. I loved Lou's strong views that life is worth living, that it can be meaningful as this echoes my thoughts. However, what we both had to consider was how the person with the disability really felt and listen to what they really wanted. Throughout the story were some really touching, special moments that made me well up, both happy and sad. I'm not too sure that I could go and watch this film at the cinema, if I did I would need plenty of tissues and a pair of sunglasses.

I think the story raises and explores the important issue of euthanasia and assisted suicide, another concept for the reader to consider alongside the characters. Within that, the characters question what it means to live; ambition, independence, relationships. Some of the quotes from the book really make you think, here are a few that stand out for me;

'Push yourself, don't settle'

 

'You only get one life.

It is actually your duty to live it as fully as possible'

 

Have you read Me Before You, what did you think?

What are your thoughts on watching a film if you've read the book?   

What I'm Reading: Here or There

This was one of the last books I picked off the shelf at the library last week but it was the first one I decided to read. It was quite a short book and one that I couldn't put down. This meant that I'd read it from cover to cover by the time I turned off my bedside lamp at around midnight on Monday. I felt the book was cleverly written and intertwines the lives of the characters. The reason I chose this book was its theme of choices and consequences, however, I think the overriding theme is about finding what makes you happy with your life.

'Do you ever get the impression that things weren't meant to be as they are? That at some point along the way you took a wrong turning and ended up down a completely different path?'

'I thought this...was who I was meant to be, and now I know it's all rubbish. It's just fake, this life, the one we go along with, the one we think we've chosen but in reality there was only ever one option; the pressures we put on ourselves to conform, to be secure, to go down the safer route -it's all meaningless.'

These two quotes really resonated with me. More recently as my confidence grows I have felt more positive about my job, however, if I've had a bad few days, or weeks, I sometimes sit and think, 'how did I end up here?' I think about whether this is what I want and what is stopping me thinking about changes. I realise the things stopping me are the pressures I put on myself to be secure (financially) and stick to the safer option.

As I've mentioned before, experiences have changed the direction of my life path and I am not working with the people I had planned to following the completion of my degree. Instead of going back to working with adults, I work within a children's service. Sometimes I wonder whether I would be happier working in a different role with adults (is the grass always greener and all that). Sometimes I wonder if I was meant to end up here. I don't regret any of the twists and turns, each one has taught me something and I believe that we as individuals are made up of our experiences, good and bad, and that they are what inform and guide us. For me the question is really where do I go from here. I also didn't really plan post degree so I haven't figured out what comes next and for someone who likes a plan (or at least a rough sense of direction) I am a slight state of uncertainty and unease.

Another of my dilemmas is that I enjoyed the work I did pre university, however, this wasn't as well paid as the job I do now, which was a motivator for me to study. I don't like to think of myself as someone who is money orientated, but as a single, independent person I want to be able to live comfortably without the need to rely on others. Therefore, at the moment two of my wishes conflict with each other, my path, it appears, has forked and I need to decide which direction to take.

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Have you had similar dilemmas? Which direction did you take?

What I'm Reading: Elizabeth is Missing

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I was searching for books to read and decided to follow a friends advice and search the top books of 2014. Before this I had been working my way through Patricia Cornwall's Scarpetta crime novels and James Patterson's Women's Murder Club series of crime novels. Can you spot a theme? A favourite genre of mine? While awaiting the release of new books from these series I decided to see what else was out there. I was intrigued by Elizabeth is Missing after reading a comment on The Guardian's website, 'Emma Healey's dementia detective story.'

I have worked with individuals with Dementia as well as attending training on the condition through my work as a home care assistant. In recent years my Grandad has experienced significant issues with his memory. I am interested in the disease and how best to work with individuals who have it to enable them to live as well and independently as possible. I feel the same way about any disability.

I went on to read the blurb, to find out a little bit more about the story I was going to become part of. The story is centred about the central character, Maud. Maud is in her eighties and has vascular dementia. Maud narrates her quest to unravel and solve two tales, one is the disappearance of her friend Elizabeth, the second, interwoven through flashbacks, is the mystery of Maud's sister's disappearance seventy years earlier. This is alongside Maud using handwritten notes to herself, not always successfully, to keep track of her day to day life and discoveries.

I thought I had a reasonable understanding of Dementia and how to work with individuals who have it, however, what this book did for me was to give me an insight into what it was like for the individual, how it made them feel when they could see in others reactions that they had forgotten or irritated, the uncertainty and fear felt at times. Some of Maud's mannerisms also made me smile to myself because in them I recognised Grandad, asking the same questions repetitively, reading aloud and following instructions even if it is not the right time to do so. An example of this is when Grandad reads PUSH on the belt clasp of his wheelchair. He will push it and undo his belt even when he needs it to stay done up. After it is secured again, now he has seen it, he cannot leave it alone and every time he sees the instruction, what does he do? Pushes it and around again we go.

I thought that Elizabeth is Missing was a great book, I loved the aspect that touched me personally but also following the unravelling of the two mysteries.

Have you read the book, what are your thoughts?